I have to say that I do not cry that often although I have done more over the last year than over the other 44. The reason I find tears difficult is probably linked to childhood. Being part of a large group of kids (there were 6 children all together) we were simply told to stop whinging or grow up, so I have always thought of crying as being linked to immaturity or moaning. I never saw my dad cry apart from when his Sister died and I have to say it freaked me out as I thought only women cried up until that point. Of course crying can often be a tactic to get what you want. Around all the women I have known I always give in when the first few gushes of the salt lake appear and I remain convinced that women know this. Many a time a good argument for a man is ruined by sudden and unexpected tears, it interrupts your flow and then you have to engage sympathy mode which is at odds with argumentative mode. Of course there are gender stereotypes at play. You say I made my wife cry and the response is 'you big bully, how could you etc etc etc. You say my wife made me cry today and people say' ooh you big Wuss man up for goodness sake. This results in men not revealing their true feelings which ends up with accusations that we men are lacking in feelings, no it has been expected and we then live up to the stereotype created by others for us. So from now on I will cry at the opening of an onion, Armageddon and Jessica's latest piano report. So next time you visit me bring a box of tissues it could get quite wet.
John
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